Dating isn't an Extravagence

"I know for me, it's always you." - T.Swifty

We're ditching the kids tonight. Actually, we ditch them twice a month. It sounds extravagant, doesn't it? For years I thought it was enough to manage one night a month, which usually became one night every other month. After our second baby was born our marriage hit its lowest low. Finally my husband grabbed me, unmet need in his eyes, and told me that he needed to date me. Often. So I put my thinking cap on and came back with twice a month. One night a month the kids would sleepover with grandparents and another night we would get a babysitter. It was the first time we had ever paid a babysitter. We always relied on grandparents before that, and it just wasn't enough. Putting down money just to get out of the house felt borderline frivolous--even a bit selfish--and at first I balked at it. But I was wrong.

Dating is worth every penny, because it's loving my husband well.

Loving him well is loving my children well.

Loving him well is loving myself well.

Loving him well is loving God well.


Find a way, fellow mommies, find a way. Get grandparents in on the game. Do a kid exchange with another couple once a month. Skip a new shirt to pay for a babysitter. If you are dating often enough that it feels extravagant, it's probably just enough. Our most essential human relationship requires a little extravagance.