I wake up every morning with my heart focused on myself instead of God. I continue in my self-centered mindset all day until I meet with God and the Holy Spirit renews my soul again. Even if I connect with God in the morning, my prone-to-wander heart continues to revert back to sin and self throughout my day. That’s why abiding is essential. My default will always be living for myself instead of God’s glory. I can't fix this wandering-heart problem by my own power, but only by staying plugged into God throughout my day.
I wrote about abiding in #unsupermommybook as staying connected to God the same way we are connected to our husbands, moms, or best friends throughout our day. When I wrote the book, I was in a season so intense that my need of God was always right in front of my face. I absolutely had to stay connected or I couldn't survive my day. But as my boys have grown older, I found myself abiding less, and I missed that intimacy with God that came in the face of adversity. I prayed for a method I could use to train my brain not to forget to abide with God in a simpler season without creating an unending list of rules for my day (a legalistic stumbling block for me as a recovering rule-aholic). I didn't want to get myself into a rules over relationship mindset with God again.
Instead of creating rules, I thought about the natural rhythms of my day. Rhythms that are already an integrated and necessary part of my day that can signal my heart to draw near to God through spiritual disciplines. I’m going to share my spiritual rhythms with you as examples, but I encourage you to make your own based on the regularly scheduled events of your life. This post will give you an overview of how I abide with God, but please recognize these four things as you read:
- I usually don’t manage to do all of these methods in one day
- This is a peek into my personal relationship with God, not a prescription for exactly what your relationship with God should look like
- I developed these rhythms over time, not all at once
- The purpose is not to create rules, but to foster relationship
Make my bed: As I make my bed, I say an adapted version of the prayer that Paul Tripp says every morning. The goal is to submit myself to God's sovereignty, reorient my thinking, and reestablish my relationship with God as I naturally wake up focused upon myself. Honestly, some mornings I don't make my bed (it's a habit I'm still trying to institute), but I always pray this prayer over my son on our way to school, so I pray it for myself then too if I haven't made my bed that morning.
The Prayer: Dear God, I need your help today. Please send your help my way, and give me the grace to recognize your help when it comes. Thank you for dying on the cross to free me from my sin and give me the power I need to live as a new creation. In Jesus' powerful name, amen.
First Things First: I try to read the Bible first, before my kids get up, or with a kid looking at books in the chair next to me if one gets up early. On the days I don't get out of bed on time, I listen to my Bible app as I get ready, read a little as I eat breakfast if I can, then study more after we get home from taking my oldest to school. I am not above letting my little boys watch a TV show if I haven't had the opportunity to read my Bible by mid-morning.
Shower: Let's get real here, silence/solitude are hard spiritual disciplines to institute--especially as a mom of young kids. Almost as hard as it is to get a shower in, am I right? On the few days a week that I do manage a shower (we won't talk about how often I wash my hair), I like to use that time for silence. It is amazing how the practice of silence helps me dig deeper into whatever spiritual truths I've been meditating on. It's also where I receive the most inspiration on what I should write next!
At the kitchen sink: Anytime I find myself at my kitchen sink for more than two minutes, I try to practice my scripture memorization. I use both the "press on mama" and "grief and sorrow" cards by Words Worth Noting, and keep them tucked on the window sill behind my sink so I can't miss them while I'm standing there.
In the car: We spend a lot of time in the car these days taking kids to and from two different schools, so I use my car time for a variety of ways to connect to God. Every morning I listen to the Jesus Storybook Bible on audible, discuss the story, and pray together with my boys. During the rest of the car rides I worship, meditate on the scripture I read during my morning devotions, pray, disciple/encourage friends (via voxer), and learn more about God through sermons and podcasts.
Laundry: Laundry is usually a time for podcasts that help me learn more about God or apply the gospel to life and ministry, but occasionally I just take this time for prayer and silence.
Disciplining and discipling my Kids: I know this is kind of strange one, but with three little boys, discipline and discipling is definitely a rhythm built-in to my day. Whenever I have the opportunity to share the gospel with them, I try to preach that same gospel to myself. When I ask them to confess, I consider what I may need to confess myself.
Cleaning: This is a time to serve, not with grumbling or disdain, but to love my family with a humble heart in the same way that Jesus loved his disciples by washing their feet.
Before bed: I find Christian non-fiction the perfect way to set my spirit at rest in God's provision before bed.
In the night watches: When I need to get up in the middle of the night with my boys (thankfully not that often anymore), I take that opportunity to pray over my child and preach to myself the gift it is to love them in such a straightforward way.
If I can be vulnerable, I look at this list and it feels like both a lot and not enough. If I do all of this in a day, I still won't even begin to discover the fullness of our glorious God. Then there's the sinful, selfish part of me that recognizes that these practices of abiding will take up time that I would love to use for reading fiction or playing games on my phone (yep, I like phone games), and this list starts to feel like way too much. And there's still more I could do. I'd like to integrate prayer more, but I haven't figured out good rhythms for different kinds of prayer yet (I'll take your suggestions, I'm currently considering praying while going to the bathroom, lol), or found a prayer resource that works well for me.
But when I lean into God in these ways by the power and leading of the Holy Spirit, I never, ever regret it. I know that if you take the time to tie the practice of abiding with God into your daily rhythms, you won't regret it either. Abiding changes our lives, because it is by staying attached to the vine that we bear good fruit. Start small, just one discipline attached to one daily rhythm, and see how it draws you near to God. Once you experience intimacy with God, you can't help but want more. Remember, we're not after a list of rules, but a deeper relationship with our incredible Savior.